If I Had Known...

Jim and I had the whole weekend to ourselves. The weather was amazing, and we had time for naps and reading in the breeze and naps, and walking around downtown, strolling through museums, seeing friends, going to a movie, and naps.

We walked around downtown last night for a couple of hours, because I was just itching to take a few pictures, scout out some new hideouts for an upcoming client, and to hold hands with Mr. Koch. Sunday night is best for that, because Downtown is practically empty.

I really only had an itch for a few pictures, but Jim was eager to get his hands on my camera somewhere other than our house. He took all kinds of shots. It was super fun. I showed him all sorts of things, like making white balance adjustments, how to focus on a subject, and how to move the focal point around. We talked composition, and all kinds of basic things.

And then he started taking pictures of me. It was originally my idea, I needed a new profile picture, like one I didn't take quick in a mirror myself and settle for because I was so done taking pictures of myself in a mirror (nothing is stupider, I assure you).

But man, if I had known I was going to be getting my close-up, I would've gotten ready first.

So here I am with almost no make-up on my face, post-nap, but in a favorite shirt, so that's a bonus.

He did a great job, no? All I did was add slight cropping, and a few other things (like removing the zits on my chin). Less than 5 minutes of editing on each one. It was creepy seeing my own face staring back at me inside Photoshop.

I love my husband.

Movie Night

We have a movie night at least once a week.

There's almost always a little snack.

We all sit together, either in the family room, or in our bed, if we're watching something via the Internet from Netflix instant view. The kids of course love the bed more, because it's otherwise a no-fly zone for anyone but Dad and Mom (and the pets).

This night, it was just the nine of us, a huge bag of licorice, and Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Bebo watched with rapt attention. Bacon slept. Bella did a little of both. I teared up twice. I blame the PMS.

The OTHER Jim in my Life

So I was walking into the GAP yesterday and the sight of the big display pictures in the windows triggered that spot in my memory that holds all things random and releases them without reason and I instantly thought of this guy...


And then all I could think about was how much I miss this guy...

Sweet September is rolling in soon...

Resolution

As I sat here this morning, with Jesus and Quicken, I made a resolution.

Today we are more than provided for.

When tomorrow is Today, all we need and more will be there.

And so Today is what I will dwell on.

If you read this, you might get lost in there. There's no order to this, whatsoever.

Seriously. It's not like a cornfield, where you can just keep walking one way, and you'll eventually get out. Really, you may not want to start reading this at all. Not even sure if it makes sense...but I did get an A+ from the spell checker, so, I'm satisfied.

I've been busy enjoying the last couple weeks of summer with my kids, before school starts, taking a break from the regular routine, and instead smelling the grass, going shopping for fun, and watching in amazement as Grace removes one wiggly tooth after another. The child is going to need me to run her apples through the food processor before we know it. My word.

I'm in super-planning mode, creating lesson plans for our entire first semester (used to do it for each quarter), so I can sit back and enjoy the ride through December. It's extremely fun, and I'm super-charged with enthusiasm and energy to get started on a new year. My kids are having fun with their "total freedom" of schedule for the moment, but after three days, Grace was already asking if we could get some "school books" from the library, and Patience dearly misses the school room. I told them no. School Room is off-limits. (This only increases the anticipation to get back in, you know.) But, I'm thrilled that they're going to be happy to get back to school. In the meantime, I'm surrounded by books and notebooks and planning sheets and I've got the Voyage of Discovery, the Mayflower, and all other American history through the signing of the Declaration on the brain, and it's swimming in there with awesome books to read about all kinds of things, and that stuff is chilling in there with Emily Dickinson, Robert Louis Stevenson, Vivaldi, Gershwin, Picasso and Cassatt. Not to mention all the science lessons I haven't decided on yet- but, OH, will they be good. I love school.

I've had the perfect amount of photography work this week, Praise God, and can't wait to see what's next.

Hudson fell twice this week, once off the family room couch onto the hard wood floor, once down the stairs at the Pavilion, both times hitting the SAME spot on his head, bless his heart. He's got twice the bump, but seems no worse for the wear...

I'd happily take a weekend away with my man, but let's face it, it's not going to happen.

The sky was so gorgeous yesterday, it made me glad down deep that I know the One who made it.

And I just haven't been giving this blog much love.

I WILL show the love soon...after all the lesson planning business. Really. Maybe. No. I will.

Just One More Cat Tale

We have a new baby. Her name is Bella. She is fluffy and delicate, full of sugar and spice and everything nice and with extra-long whiskers to boot. She's divine.


She grew up here, in the loft of Jim's parents' barn. In those bales over there to the right.

The kids went to the farm several times this summer, and the girls, Grace especially, spent a lot of time in the hay, searching out "kitty holes" as they call them- spots that look like a nice, cozy hole where a Mama Cat may just choose to keep her kittens.

It was actually really entertaining to watch. On one occasion I came along (I was usually working.) I observed Grace and Patience climb the precarious stairs to the loft, huge flashlight in hand, in search of "baby kitties". They'd survey the bales, showing me the places that looked good, places they'd already "tried", and places that were, in fact, full of kitties.

How did they know there were kitties? By reaching deep inside the hole, of course. One girl would hold the flashlight steady, while the other reached in shoulder deep, Indiana Jones style, to feel around for kitties. Quietness was also important, I learned, to keep from scaring the Mamas, and to be able to hear the mewing.

This is one little jackpot of babies they found (I think with Grandpa's help). I was there for this one. Farm fresh baby cats are really, really cute, people.


When the girls found some kitties, they took it upon themselves to gently remove them from their nest, take them out (gently) to a nearby bale, and herd them up for some lovin' and tamin'. Grace, especially, spent hours with kitties this summer. One day I couldn't find her outside anywhere with her sisters, and sure enough, there she was, up in the loft in a quiet corner, keeping several little fuzzy mewers corralled on a bale, while she held them, one by one, and sang quiet little songs to them. Seriously. Slay my heart. I listened for about 5 minutes before I let her know I was there.

We didn't know she'd be ours at the time, as we had other kitties that we'd adopted, but that's Bella up there, in front, several weeks ago.

In case you're wondering, and I'm wondering how you came to read this entire post, as I'm sure you're wondering if I'll ever stop posting about cats-

Bebo instantly claimed her as his own, and they have a wonderful relationship. Bacon, jealous for Bebo's attention, is learning to love her, though he hates all these fuzzy things coming in and taking his best buddy's time away from him.

All three sleep in a heap frequently.

And we love our second-chance kitty.

Raw Chicken

We had a hard week last week. And then we went to the fair.

I found it highly therapeutic to spend a good 20 minutes

taking pictures of these ridiculous chickens. And one duck.

My kids agreed.

I also considered titling this post "Do the Funky Chicken".

Since there was a duck, and since they're SOOC, I thought that one was better.

Here's a few of my chickens in the RAW.

Another

Wednesday night, in an event completely unrelated to how we lost Bokeh, but just as random, we lost our other little cat, Boots, too. This time, our kids were there for his sudden, unexpected departure. And they sat together, taking turns holding him, loving him, and telling him what they loved most about him, as he took his last breaths. And then they had a small funeral, and told their second little baby goodbye.

In light of losing our other cat just last week, this was an especially hard blow. And he really was a spectacular cat.

I know if you're not particularly drawn to animals, you might not understand why these losses are a big deal. But they are a big deal. Not like the weight of losing a person, at all, but it's a sharp cut to deal with the death of anything that you really care about. And we all process it in different ways.

It's been a hard year for us. Good, and good and hard. And the complexities of life for us were really building last week. Life is at once very, very good, and also just very difficult right now. And to be honest, I really would have rather not had to see my children lose both their little "babies" in the same week.

And I'm just done talking about it.

I'm the type of person who just has to see what good God gives in any situation. I have to see it. He doesn't disappoint, and always shows me.

One of the reasons we loved taking on the project of rescuing those tiny babies was to help our girls get hands on with caring for animals, having responsibilities, taking ownership of the care of another creature, and all the wonder, work and joy that goes into raising up a growing example of God's good creation. And they did get to do that. And when you open your heart up to anything you love, it has to be open to loss as well. And they've experienced both. It's painful, but it's very much a part of life. Our girls, especially Grace and Patience, who are older, have taken the loss with a lot of heart and grace. I'm proud of them.

In losing their cats, none of our children had even a thought or question of, "Where does Boots go when he dies?" They just know. Animals are here to be a bright, varied display of God's creativity and design, but they don't have souls. It's just a fact. Our kids know exactly what happens to an animal when it dies. It dies. Grace and Patience were even bringing that up on their own- that Boots is really just dead now, but when people die, we go on forever. I'm incredibly thankful that in a real life situation like this, their little hearts and minds naturally make that distinction. I know that they know that most important thing to know. So thank you, Lord, for that.

We do, by the way, still have our two most excellent dogs, who are fantastic in a hundred ways, still faithfully lovin' us and following us around, being great little guys. They're snoring in unison right now.

Animals make life better. Really.

The Most Un-Humble Granola

This granola is full of pride.

It has to be. It's better than every other granola, and it knows. So all that knowledge of it's goodness probably goes to it's head.

I kid you not, blogland, on the VERY morning that I was planning to sit down and write this post, I received an email from a friend with "breakfast delight" in the subject line, and the entire contents of the email were, and I quote, " FYI, your granola is the best ever."

See? It really is the best. That person, BTW, really, really digs granola.

It's an old 4H camp recipe, handed down for...generations...I'm sure. Well, at least 2 generations, then, because Jim ate it at camp when he was growing up, and now we eat it almost every morning. We make ourselves alternate between other kinds of breakfasty things, but really, we'd rather just always eat this. Thank you, 4H.

Camp Granola

5 C Oatmeal

1 C Coconut

3/4 C Brown Sugar

2 T Cinnamon

1 t salt

3/4 C Oil

3 T Vanilla

I would love to add slivered almonds, but that makes it expensive, so I don't. But you should. It would be good.

Triple the amounts you see up there. No, really, I mean triple it. Mix it all up. Bake it on a cookie sheet (when tripling, like you should be doing, you'll probably need a large turkey roaster, like we use- something with sides). Bake at 300 degrees (preheated of course) for 1 hour, stirring every 10 minutes. DO NOT forget to stir it, or it will toast unevenly, and some will burn.

Let it cool, then store in an airtight container. Mix in some dried cherries or cranberries or raisins if you want. That's good too.

And now you know.

First.

Last Friday night, I returned home from a long photo shoot to a quiet house. Jim and the kids were away for the weekend, visiting grandparents and going to the fair.

That's when I found that our tiny kitten, Bokeh, had accidentally fallen, and injured herself in a way that could only end one way. But she was still very much alive.

I knew what would happen, and I was all alone, left to just hold her and hope it would end soon.

When I couldn't do it anymore, I handed her to Bebo, and he cleaned her head to toe, loved on her, snuggled her, and curled himself around his tiny baby in a quiet corner, away from the rest of us. He knew what would happen, and he tenderly loved her until the end. My heart broke seeing that tender affection between creatures.

And my heart broke for my kids' hearts, especially Patience, who rescued Bokeh and was to Bokeh what Fern was to Wilbur. And I didn't want her to think the hours she spent holding and nuzzling her weakling back to health were in vain. I didn't want any of my children to know this most important lesson that we all must face for the first time, at some time.

And so my children have had their first taste of death and loss.

Is it a Colloquiallism, or an Idiom? Both? I Can't Decide.

The Cobbler's Children Have No Shoes.

All the flowers in my house are dying. Well, they're dead.

I haven't showered yet today.

Until about an hour ago, my house was just plain dirty.

And I'm pretty sure something was growing in my sink. Just a little something. It's gone now. Don't worry.

And my personal blog, the one I love to spend time with so much, hasn't been touched since Monday, and let's face it, that post was just pathetic.

But this blog has something new. And it's that, and a slew of other things that have kept my sink so funky.

Yo, I'm not complaining. It's been a fantastic couple of days. Family time, and by myself time. And a husband who will never get thrown out of the bed for eating crackers. I'm a blessed woman.

There's a huge frame in my living room with no picture in it whatsoever. And my plans to refresh the ones that do have something in them with something new...that's still somewhere in my future...

But like I said, the cobbler's children have no shoes...right?

I'm going to go eat strawberries and cool whip for lunch. Shh.

Ever Wanted to Know?

If you've ever wanted to find a good way to add to the number of things you know for sure you don't know, start a business.

Doing so provides unlimited opportunities for you to add to your "I'm a Clueless Idiot" List.